The Bachelor
by featherkitten
Summary: Having been convinced by Rachel to sign up Kurt becomes the first gay bachelor. His first day has some surprise faces for him. Highly AU. Anti Klaine, Anti Blaine. Kurt x a lot of guys. Finn is alive. Please review.
1. Chapter 1

I never watched the Bachelor so sorry if this is inaccurate.

Highly AU. Kurt broke up with Blaine after Scandals. Kurt never went to NYADA and the contestants here were never at Kurt's school in this AU because it feels silly to have everyone know Kurt. Set after the series ended, in today's year so Kurt is 24 to 25. I know his wiki says differently but it also has birth year as 1993 so he can't be as old as Chris Colfer.

Mentions of past sexual assault re: when Blaine didn't listen to Kurt saying no in Scandals. But it's not described in detail.

* * *

Kurt couldn't believe that he had let Rachel talk him into this. _It'll really make people notice you_ , she had said. _First gay bachelor that's a big achievement. And a free vacation! Think about it._

Maybe it was but it wasn't something that he could put on his resume. He finished his fashion degree along with Tina when Rachel had sprung this on him. Even as Finn filmed Kurt's tape for the show, he hadn't thought he would get in.

Finn, Burt, Carole, Rachel, Mercedes and Tina had hugged him at the airport. Other friends had hugged him and some had patted him on the back. Well wishes and requests for souvenirs were given. Rachel had clapped excitedly, bouncing a bit.

"You'll do great," she said.

"Thanks," Kurt said. "I'll miss all of you."

Then he grabbed his suitcases and was on his way. Burt put a hand on Kurt's shoulder. "Hold on a moment."

Tina and Finn held up a flag that said **GOOD LUCK KURT** **HUMMEL!**

 _So that's why she was holding a white cloth._ Kurt looked away. He loved them but they were embarrassing him. "You guys are too much. For the rest of you I don't know how I'll bring back souvenirs. I doubt I can just take things off set but I'll give it a try."

"Don't be too embarrassed to come back," Burt said. "But I'm sure you won't need to." He took his hand off of Kurt's shoulder and Kurt moved away.

"I'll be back before you know it." He waved good bye one last time and when he walked off he resisted the urge to look back.

* * *

Kurt took a breath. He was standing outside the mansion waiting to greet the contestants.

"Bernard Bernard," the man said. They shook hands. "Top of my class at NYADA. You look like a dancer."

Kurt thought that Rachel might have mentioned a Bernard, in-between complaining about her NYADA dance instructor. "Kurt Hummel. I am actually or I guess was. Went into fashion."

"I should have figured. I'm really digging the blue suit."

"Thank you."

"I'll get going. A lot of guys are waiting. I hope to see a lot of you."

"See you later." Kurt wondered if any of these conversations got televised. They just aired music over the first one didn't they?

Next there was a Biff McIntosh. The man said he had been to YALE and somehow he really just held himself like he must have money. There was Rory who had an Irish accent and was very nervous about being on the show.

"I'm Rich."

"Kurt Hummel."

"I'm psychic," Rich said.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I can tell that you're a kind, caring person, always putting others first." Rich paused. "You had one long term relationship. It ended badly."

"Wow that's amazing." It was also unnerving. Kurt didn't like to talk about what happened in the Scandals parking lot. He certainly wouldn't here on national TV.

He still remembered it clearly. After he had gotten away from Blaine, Kurt gotten back into his car and drove off leaving Blaine behind. He told his dad and the Glee club what happened. Blaine had never apologised, first saying that he was just drunk, then admitting that he had done it to be Tony. Kurt couldn't believe that Blaine or anyone would do that just for a role. Thankfully Blaine left McKinley after the Glee club shamed him out of the club. Kurt didn't know where Blaine went, only that it wasn't back to Dalton.

"Kurt?"

"I'm sorry."

"I shouldn't have been so blunt. I can feel that you'll find someone here though, that you're ready for love."

"T-thank you."

Rich smiled and went inside. The host came by and made sure Kurt got a break. He asked if Kurt wanted to go inside but Kurt insisted on going back. It was fine really. He was just a bit shaken and they had been such nice guys.

Kurt smiled at the next guy, sure that nothing would unsettle him like that again. "Gavorche. Wow. Rob Pattinson was my celebrity crush but it's you now."

"I'm hardly a celebrity."

"Don't be so modest. First gay bachelor is something."

"Yeah."

Next was Walter. Kurt wasn't surprised that he was older. He had been told about this before hand and didn't have a problem with dating an older gentleman. Walter was charming too. Kurt was sure that he would get a rose.

After Walter had left a man wearing a sparkly suit with a sparkly top hat and black gloves came up to him. He was wearing a tie and had a bow-tie sticking out of his waist coat.

"Elliott 'Star Child' Gilbert."

"Who calls them-self Star Child?"

"It's a homage to David Bowie. And I was a child star in New York."

"I never heard of you."

"Then you were missing out." He tipped his hat and went inside.

Kurt watched him go. Then his eyes bugged out of his head at the next man. Jeremiah, the one who Blaine had gotten fired. That should have been when Kurt knew Blaine wasn't any good, when he insisted on serenading a boy that he didn't even know him despite Kurt and the Warblers begging him not to.

But Kurt had told himself that Jeremiah must have given Blaine mixed signals. That Blaine was just being romantic, that really Blaine being heart broken was a problem. Kurt owed Jeremiah a million apologies but he didn't know if Jeremiah even remembered him.

They exchanged greetings and Jeremiah said he'd see him inside. Kurt watched him go, wondering how to apologise without airing everything out in front of the cameras.

Sebastian Smythe came up to Kurt, smiling from ear to ear. Kurt remembered how he had flirted with Blaine and Kurt himself when he was visiting friends in Dalton. When Sebastian had left, Kurt thought that he was never going to see him again.

"Sebastian Smythe."

Kurt smiled, not wanting to break face again. "Kurt Hummel."

"I hope I'm seeing you for a while." Sebastian winked and strutted away.

Kurt wondered if anymore reminders of the past would pop up. He had avoided things that reminded him of Blaine so well until now. Expect for the friends that used to also be Blaine's but he had known them before he knew Blaine.

Then there was Mark, they had a conversation that was oddly similar to the one he had to Bernard. After Wes and John, a blond man came up.

"I'm Adam Crawford."

"Kurt Hummel but I guess all of you already know that."

"Yeah. I saw your audition tape and know that you sing. I'm the leader of Adam's Apples back in NYADA."

"They must miss you back home."

"The girls can handle the band. They signed me up for this."

"My friend Rachel convinced me to do this."

Adam smiled. "Guess we're in the same boat. I'll see you inside."

"Yeah." Kurt watched Adam leave. The accent was to die for and he seemed sweet to boot. Kurt knew that he wasn't sending that one home.

Kurt smiled as another cute boy walked up to him.

"Sam Evans." He held out a rose. "I have to say you would do great in modelling. I model on the side so I know what I'm talking about."

Kurt took the rose. "Thank you." Kurt looked Sam up and down. "I'll have to pick up the next magazine your in."

Sam looked away shyly. "No big names yet. But I hope you do. See you inside."

Kurt smelled the rose. "Yeah."

He didn't have much time to see Sam leave. Another contestant had eagerly half jogged up the stairs to take Sam's place. He held out his hand. "I'm Chandler. I know the bachelors are supposed to be attractive but I didn't expect this."

"You're not so bad yourself."

Chandler held out a white lily and Kurt took it. "I love lilies."

He was still grinning widely when the next contestant came. This really wasn't so bad. "Mike Chang."

"Kurt Hummel."

"I'm really looking forward to getting to know you better."

"I feel the same way."

Apparently Mike didn't have anything more to say because he went inside.

He barely had any time to be disappointed because the next guy quickly caught his attention. Oh, Kurt recognised this one though thankfully not from anytime that had to do with Blaine. Jessie St James had made himself a name on Broadway recently. Kurt had been bummed out that he could never catch one of his shows.

"Kurt Hummel," Kurt said.

"I wish I had thought of bringing a flower. Jessie St James."

"Yes. I've ah, heard of you."

Jessie smiled. "All good things I hope. I look forward to getting to know you better."

"Same to you. I would love to pick your brain, I heard great things about your performances."

"Hope I get the chance to talk to you about them then. See you Kurt."

"Bye Jessie."

 _Be cool Kurt_ , Kurt thought as he looked back at Jessie. _He's probably just a regular guy in reality._

After him was Chase. Kurt smiled at the next guy, wondering if this guy was a model as well.

"I'm Brody."

"Kurt Hummel. You don't do any modelling do you?"

"No." Brody looked him up and down. "Do you?"

Kurt opened his mouth, he almost said yes but it was better not to start things on lies. "No."

"I look forward to getting to know you."

"Me too. Getting to know you of course."

Next there was Matt who was really sweet. Kurt didn't know who he would eliminate. Well he definitely couldn't keep Sebastian, could he? He didn't have time to ponder it before the next guy was walking up.

He had introduced himself as Thad, he had given Kurt a red rose before leaving. Next there was Gavin who was also a model and thought Kurt should be one, Kurt never thought that someone would tell him that, let alone several guys in one day.

David, Trent, Cody and Eli C. were the last ones and Kurt was glad when they were gone because it felt like he had been standing there the entire day.

Someone yelled cut and Kurt got to sit down while the make up girl touched up his face and told him how lucky he was. He went to the mansion but it wasn't time to meet the guys yet. They had him going over head shots of the guys first.

Kurt sat in the mansion's bar and sighed. "This is going to be hard."

A man holding a file smiled. "Too cute? We have the audition tapes through that door if you need to see them." He pointed to a room. "Let me know if you have any questions."

Kurt smiled. "Thanks. I'll think about looking at those." He was really curious what Sebastian's audition tape had been like. He imagined that there was a lot of posturing but maybe he was wrong. It had been years and how well had he ever really known him? Kurt took the file and sat down at the bar.

"You don't mind if I drink, do you?" Were there any rules about drinking? Kurt couldn't remember reading anything about it when he had signed the contract. He felt like he needed to relax first, soon he'd have to send a lot of those guys home.

"Help yourself. I think all of the champagne has been moved to the party."

"I need something stronger anyway." Kurt ended up pouring himself a scotch and flipping the folder open.

* * *

They had some time to chat along themselves before Kurt entered. This supposed to be the time where they got drunk on champagne and chatted about Kurt. Some of the men had grouped together.

Pleasant music played in the background but Sebastian would have preferred to listen to something a bit more exciting.

The contestants weren't supposed to know the Bachelor but it couldn't be helped now. He would have still applied if he had known it was going to Kurt, he wasn't that concerned about breaking rules. Their back and forth banter had been fun back in high school and Kurt and him shared an ex didn't bother him. Even if it had bothered him with how Kurt looked now Sebastian would have gotten over it. It was a bit awkward to see him though, he never thought that Kurt liked him but then Kurt hadn't gotten him kicked off the show then and there. Admitting they knew each other was all it would have taken to get rid of him.

One of the blond men came up to him and held out a hand. "I'm Sam Evans."

''Sebastian Smythe." He shook his hand.

"What do you think of Kurt?"

"He's hot." He wasn't bad looking when they were in high school but Sebastian had never thought that Kurt Hummel of all people would wind up looking like _that_.

"Yeah. Seems really nice too. I hope he finds the right guy."

Sebastian nodded. "Well he was plenty to chose from." He wondered if Sam was in this for love or if like Sebastian he was in this for the fifteen minutes of fame and free vacation. Sure he didn't need a free vacation but it was nice to have one.

* * *

Elliott found Kurt when he entered. He had his top hat in his hands.

"Sorry about earlier," Elliott said. "I just really wanted to impress you. But if it's too over the top for you, I can downplay it."

"It's fine," Kurt said. "I like the suit actually." He hadn't expected that kind of proclamation but then people on this show tended to be over the top, didn't they? God if Elliott's answering smile didn't make Kurt's knees feel week though. Maybe, just maybe he'd forgive Rachel for pushing him into doing this. She hadn't meant any harm after all.

"Would you like to dance?"

"Yeah." Elliott wasted no time in sweeping Kurt off onto the dance floor. Kurt saw Sam and Sebastian as they danced and he waved to them. They waved back.

Mike and Thad were dancing in the distance perhaps having gotten bored of just standing around drinking champagne. _It would have been fun to take everyone to a club_ , Kurt thought. _I bet Elliott goes to karaoke clubs._ Not that he could really complain about being held like this.

"Didn't really plan to kick you out just because of the name thing," Kurt said. "I can handle a bit over the top." God knew he still had his share of over top from pretty much everyone. Maybe not Carole and his dad.

After several dances someone tapped Elliott on the shoulder. Kurt saw Bernard standing there. "Mind if I cut in?"

Kurt nearly turned red. He was supposed to be getting to know all of them and he had forgotten about everyone else. Elliott looked at Kurt.

"Sure," Kurt said. Elliott let go of him and Kurt took Bernard's hand.

Kurt spent the night dancing with various contestants and drinking champagne. The rose ceremony came up before he knew it. He felt like he had barely had any time with anyone. Kurt stood on a stage, roses lied on a stand next to him.

He had given this a lot of thought and knew the men he was going to give roses to. Kurt smiled despite his nerves and picked up the first rose.

* * *

Sebastian never threw a rock salt slushie at Kurt in this. I know that the Warblers helped Blaine serenade Jeremiah but I never understood why and this is really AU already so I changed it.

Bernard and Mark are the NYADA sycophants. Bernard is the black one and the only one who was named. But I had to name the other one something. No last name was given for Bernard but Bernard Bernard seems like such a Glee name.

I don't know how long a fashion degree usually takes or if Kurt can somehow fast track through one.

Some of these are really minor characters. I was afraid I wouldn't have enough guys. John was one of the background Warblers. Considered making this a HSM crossover and adding in Ryan and Troy.

Tell me in the comments who you want to win in the end. No guarantee that this story will get really far though.


	2. Chapter 2

Guest: thanks! I'm really glad you like the name. Maybe Sebastian will fall for him. I missed the episodes that Biff is in so I have some catching up to do but he'll stick around for a while at least. I haven't decided on who wins yet so there's still a chance.

Guest: thanks. I hope I can give this story a similar feeling to Glee episodes, expect less random.

Fitzpatrick86: thanks for the fave.

Pink-Libra-Girl: thanks for the fave and alert. We're both Libra unless you chose that username for a different reason.

kailen. hargrove: thanks for the fave. keeps deleting your name if I don't put a space after the period. I wonder if it's some sort of glitch.

CrazyDraineFan: thanks for the alert.

KadyLou: thanks for the alert.

mshilly: thanks for the alert.

setsunai: thanks for the alert.

I actually got the first rose ceremony happening so soon off of someone's Bachelorette AU so sorry if this doesn't happen on the Bachelor. I really needed to thin out some of the guys though because this is going to be too difficult to write otherwise. The stage is here because it was in the previous chapter and I don't know why I had a stage in the previous chapter.

* * *

Kurt took a breath. Someone from the show had gone over this before he had even been flown out to appear on the show. It was all about playing things up for the audience. He should have some pauses they could play music over, if he looked nervous that was all the better for ratings, he could talk about the choices a bit. It made the whole thing feel rather cheap. Kurt didn't believe in shows like this but he liked the illusion.

"I have had a lot of fun tonight," Kurt said, his smile easy even though his mind wasn't. He looked over at the audience. "I'm sorry that not some of you will be sent home tonight."

"Adam Crawford," Kurt announced. He took a rose from the podium, making an unnecessary show of it as he did so. "Do you accept this rose?"

Adam's answering smile made Kurt's knees feel weak. "I do." Adam made his way up the stage. They shared a hug before Adam moved to where the chosen bachelors were supposed to stand. Kurt felt giddy. He had always had a weakness for English accents and Adam was a sweetheart.

Kurt picked up the next rose. "Elliott Gilbert, do you accept this rose?"

Elliott looked pleasantly surprised. "I do." He walked over and hopped onto the stage. Their hands brushed as Kurt handed him the rose. Elliott gave Kurt a quick hug and a dazzling smile.

"I guess you'll be sticking around Star Child," Kurt said quietly.

"Lucky me." Elliott sauntered off to the side.

There was the roses on one side of Kurt and the bachelors on the other. Kurt wondered if anyone had turned down a rose at the first rose ceremony. _It's no use thinking about that now. You've had a great time. Any guy that doesn't want to stay can cut their losses._

"Biff McIntosh, do you accept this rose?" Kurt asked.

"I do."

 **[Confession footage]**

 **[Biff is sitting down. His job title reads: Very rich.]**

 **Biff: Kurt made the right choice in picking me. I have a lot to offer.**

The scene cut back to Biff standing next to Elliott, having taken his place at the stage. He smiled to himself.

"Bernard Bernard," Kurt said. _Who names their child that? Is his middle name also Bernard?_ Kurt held a rose out. "Do you accept this rose?"

"I do." Bernard looked back at Mark who gave him a thumbs up. "Thanks. I hope you make it too."

 **Mark [the other NYADA sycophant]: Bernard and I have been friends for ages. We're both going to be the best at NYADA one day. Obviously I hope to win but there's no hard feelings if he does.**

Eventually Kurt was down to one final rose. Among the chosen bachelors there was now Sam, Mike, Chase, Walter, Mark, Jessie St James, Brody, Rich, Jeremiah, Chandler, Matt, Rory, Gavroche and Eli C. It had felt weird to call Jeremiah's name is. Really he should have made it known that he knew Jeremiah just as he should have admitted to knowing Sebastian. As much as he wanted to apologize to Jeremiah he knew that he couldn't do that over national TV. He didn't know what his plan was. Still Jeremiah was actually a nice guy. He had been surprised by how much they had in common. He hoped that this wouldn't all be a mistake just like he hoped that who he was going to give his last rose to wouldn't be a mistake.

Kurt took a deep breath. The audience might think it was for dramatic timing but he really needed the strength. "Sebastian Smythe."

It felt like everything had gone silent as Sebastian stared in surprise at him. But really Kurt was sure that it was equally quiet when he had picked the other guys. Sebastian recovered and gave a smug smile.

"Do you accept this rose?"

"I do." Sebastian sauntered towards the stage.

* * *

At first when Kurt had called his name Sebastian hadn't noticed. He had been bored out his mind by the dramatic pauses and standing around for so long. He hadn't expected to be chosen last. When the numbers had dwindled down he had thought that maybe Kurt still held a high school grudge over Sebastian. Or maybe Kurt just didn't like him which was Kurt's loss really.

Then he realised that Kurt had called his name and couldn't hide his surprise. He covered his reaction quickly enough, he hoped.

"Do you accept this rose?"

"I do." He sauntered towards the stage. It was a waste of time to make Kurt ask that every time, he could just come on stage after his name was called.

* * *

After the last name was called, the director yelled 'cut' and Kurt walked off stage towards the mansion. The bachelors were supposed to leave for bed after he did so no one would steal extra time with him. The host of the show stopped him along the way. "You did great Kurt. You're a real natural at this. Excited for tomorrow?"

"Yeah. I can't believe I'm believe that I'm really doing this."

"You'll do great." They exchanged good nights and Kurt went on his way.

When he got inside someone told him that his bags had already been taken to his room and reminded him which room was his. Kurt had never known that the rooms inside the Bachelor mansion were numbered. After finishing his nightly routine Kurt crawled into bed and fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

I'm sorry but I didn't want to pretty much have Kurt say the same thing for forever and I just can't think up a unique scenario for every one of the guys.

Mark's the other NYADA sycophant because Bernard is the only one who's named during the series.

I considered having Kurt's family and friends react to the show as it airs but I think that would too difficult for me and interrupt the flow of the story, especially if I get into more POVs as the story goes on. Some stuff could be true but I included just for world building: Kurt and the bachelors leaving at separate times, the rooms being numbered, how much Kurt would interact with the Bachelor crew. Come to think of it would he see the audition tapes or is that only for the people that pick the contestants?

I'm not sure on a lot of things, I might redo this chapter and drop Jeremiah and Gavroche from the list of who was picked.


End file.
